Marriage ~ An Opportunity to Serve

“Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.””

(Genesis 2:23, ESV)

This past Sunday we reflected primarily on marriage as an opportunity to serve our spouse. A trap set for us is the expectation of our spouse to serve us more so than for us to serve them. Too many today are treating marriage as an opportunity to gain individually rather than to give generously. But God established marriage for mutual edification, not personal gain.

By Genesis 2, we see that God designed marriage for deep relational connection. Our hearts and minds are to become interwoven with those of our spouse. In this relationship, more than any others, we are to rejoice with the one rejoicing and to grieve with the one grieving. Are we intentionally leaning in to connect with our spouse emotionally and relationally as well as in the more practical aspects of life?

But the scriptures also present a redeeming quality to marriage. Examples include the Israelite tradition of a Kinsman Redeemer; a relative that would marry, care for, and provide for a widow and her family. Boaz served Ruth in this capacity, entering into a meaningful relationship with her as well as providing for her and her household. Ephesians 5.27-29 also speak to this, drawing attention to the holiness a believing spouse brings to the life of the unbelieving one. Let us work to honour both God and our spouse in our marriages by taking a spiritual responsibility for one another.

The final piece of serving our spouse is taking on the posture and attitude of a servant. May our focus be what we can give more so than what we can get from our relationship. While husbands are called to be loving (Ephesians 5.25) and understanding (1st Peter 3.7), and wives are called to be submissive (Ephesians 5.22, 1st Peter 3.1), these are to be done in a context of mutual submission and service (Ephesians 5.21). Let us take the posture of a servant so our love and honour are genuine and true.

By returning to these basics of marriage, may we build up our marriages, keeping Christ in the middle of them. May we seek the wisdom and patience of the Holy Spirit as we work to live a fulfilling and God-honouring marriage!